Belonging
by Uh.yeah
Summary: Another poor title, I'm afraid. Very sappy and insane angst fic. Doctor gets depressed, but Rose can help him through it. 9thRose


Forgive me. I know not what I write.

**Disclaimer: Not mine. **

**Spoilers: Jack's in it?**

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"Doctor." A soft and disembodied call from the other side of the darkened corridor. 

"Rose?"

"I'm here."

Her face came into view, the dim lamplight illuminating the concern in her eyes and a troubled frown. There was mud on one cheek and her hair had been tugged into a messy, but not unattractive, tangle.

"You're supposed to come and help us defeat the bad guys. What've you gone and done now, Doctor?" she asked, trying to joke like they normally did in these serious situations.

"Nothing." answered the Doctor, almost sullenly.

Rose's frown deepened. She'd been expecting a playful joke in return. Maybe a quick insult at the expense of the human race. But not this. She studied him closely through the bars of his tiny cell.

"Jack said I should come," she explained, "We would normally have expected you back by now, but we started to worry. He's...distracting the guards," She grinned at the memory of Jack happily sauntering off to flirt with the leather clad guards. "He makes such sacrifices for us."

"You needn't have bothered," came the Doctor's carefully guarded reply, "I think this is where I belong, actually."

"Belong?" Rose stared at him in confusion, "What d'you mean, 'belong'? How can you belong in a cell? And a bloody small one at that."

"This planet shouldn't really be here," The Doctor spoke in a quiet monotone, "It was almost entirely destroyed by... by something I did. For no reason. If the people hadn't been so determined, it would have ceased to exist entirely. But they rebuilt. Repopulated. They did all that; brought everything back together. Amazing, really. But no matter how many planets you rebuild, how many new children are born, how can you ever relieve the pain of pointlessly losing loved ones? Of witnessing family, friends, lovers die? You can't. You can try and move on, but you can't forget," his voice broke, "So I think it's best if I just stayed here, thank you very much."

Rose watched his face in the flickering light as he carefully avoided her eyes. This was a different Doctor she was facing. She'd never known him be so openly consumed by guilt. It was true people had died due to decisions he'd made. And it was true that he could feel each death as his responsibility. But even though it was a terrible thought, it was often necessary. But here he was, separated from her by bars and looking more afraid and more vulnerable than Rose could have thought possible.

She moved closer so she could snake her arm through the bar and cup the side of his face in her hand. She titled his head so he looked straight up and into her eyes.

"You don't forget," she said softly, "You don't stop missing them. There's pain, yeah. But you learn to let it heal. It can't be exactly as it was, but you can remember how to smile and laugh. You can start loving again. And you can carry on living. You have to – you owe it to those who are gone. Whatever you did, I'm sure it was for a reason. You can't just stop and give up on all this. Besides, I'm not ready to let you go. You belong out here, with me, not in a cell. The world needs a Doctor and I'm afraid you're him."

He stared at her for a few, breathless moments before he turned his head and gently kissed the palm of her hand.

Rose shivered a little at the first touch of his lips to her soft skin.

Slowly he reached out to cradle Rose's face in his rough hands and he brought her forward to the bars.

He gave a small and thankful smile before leaning forward and kissing her. It was gentle, soft and told Rose everything she had ever needed to know. And some things she had known all along, but never been sure of.

Rose breathed in sharply as her cheek grazed roughly against the harsh surface of the bars.

The Doctor froze at her soft signal of pain. Drawing back, in one swift movement of blue light, he had opened the door and pulled Rose inside.

"You could do that all along?" asked Rose, incredulously, "You are unbelievable."

"I just needed the right incentives," he informed her cheekily, before pulling her close again.

A little while later, with some effort, Rose firmly withdrew from the Doctor's warm and protective embrace.

"Nice as this is, aren't we supposed to be getting you _out_, rather than me _in_?"

"Knew I'd forgotten something," grinned the Doctor, taking Rose's hand and giving it a squeeze, "Back to the TARDIS?"

"Don't forget Jack," warned Rose.

"Right. Jack. You know, I think Jack could finish things up here. He's perfectly capable."

"No Doctor, we're going to go help him. And then we're bringing him back with us."

"Alright," sighed the Doctor, giving Rose's hand a tug as he led her out the cell, "Let's go back to saving the world."

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Ok, yeah, I know. Completely out of character. Completely out of sync with the series. But for some insane reason, I had to write it. 

Review and tell me honestly...


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